Santa – the Good, the Bad and the Downright Ugly

Lindy Moone:

Thank you to David Lawlor for a year of great blog posts about the history we were never taught in school. (You know: the interesting stuff!)
And to all a good night…

Originally posted on historywithatwist:

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot
A bundle of Toys he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a peddler, just opening his pack.

His eyes-how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow.
(A Visit From St Nicholas)

Ah yes, we’re gearing up for that time when children all over the world await the arrival of the big man with the beard and the red suit – and that’s all that need be said to know of whom we speak. All I have to do is recall the movie Miracle on 34th Street and a warm fuzzy glow warms my tummy…

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10 Things that SUCK (and ROCK!) about Being an Indie Author (Part 1)

Lindy Moone:

“Congratulations” and “commiserations” are synonyms in the publishing game. Poor Christina didn’t know that for sure, not until now. Not until she published her first book. So congratulations, Christina. Writing well is the best revenge.

Originally posted on A Spark in the Dark:

I’ve finally come full-circle in the indie world. I’m sure you’ve heard me banging pots and pans and trashcan lids about self-publishing my first novel, an Upper YA Dystopian/Sci-fi with Biopunk elements, titled “The Treemakers.” I’ve stocked up on air horns, whistles, and megaphones, hired an entire junior high school cheerleading squad, and rented a helicopter for next week with plans to hurl these babies into the streets, while caroling topless and wearing Santa hats on my . . .

you know. . . . BEING INDIE

I’ll inform you of the outcome . . . possibly after I am out of jail.

*lip fart*

SO. Yeah . . . .

I’ve learned some stuff, and I’m pretty damn sure there’s tons more I’m going to learn (starting with the helicopter thing). But for all you guys out there who are more newbie than me, or even some of you seasoned indies who…

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These Trolls are Killing Me but at Least They are Publishing Stuff!

troll Createspace cover newbellyup

The new full cover!

I know, I know: I haven’t written an original post since August. Just reblogging my brains out… and working on the antrollogy, which I’m illustrating myself because I suffer from delusions that it will all work out someday. So I redrew the cover, because it needed to match the interior illustrations. As usual, it’s not finished, but whaddya think?

Then you might as well see one of the interior shots:

troll mystery1

Of course, I realized that the illustrations were all the WRONG SIZE for the paperback, so I’m redrawing them, cuz THAT doesn’t take much time.

Meanwhile, lots of the “trolls” have published new books since we started this project together, and over the next few weeks I will try to devote some blog time to each of them.

So now you know why I reblog. In case you missed it, here’s my last original post, from August. At least I’m reblogging myself today. (Probably not something to brag about. I’ll go blind!) This post was instigated by Christina L. Rozelle, who has an intriguing new book coming out soon — The Treemakers. I will keep you informed! Meanwhile, if you’d like to read her chapter 1, you can check it out here:
http://christinalrozelle.com/2014/10/30/the-treemakers-chapter-1/

BECAUSE SOMEONE HAS TO SORT OUT EEYORE:

I’ve been asked by Christina L. Rozelle, author of The Truth About Mud (the second-longest story in my troll anthology), to post “Why I Write.” If you have blog-hopped here from there, thank you for coming. If you have hopped here from elsewhere, please hop on over to the link above. (Not now! Sheesh!)

Of course, there are lots of answers to Christina’s question — a different one for every day. A month ago I might have answered glibly, “Because it’s fun to wantonly use adverbs,” and run away — figuratively, of course, since my ass was firmly planted in this chair and it was hot, so my elbows were hopelessly stuck to the desk. (They still are.)

Peske_Little_Girl_in_red_Dress

Here’s me, showing my panties to a cabbage

I started writing (actually printing) as a four-year-old, when I made up stories about the family that lived in my closet — the closet I shared with my little sister. In that family, everyone had their own room, even the Mommy and Daddy (why should they have to share, after all?) and a sock doll named Eegie and Tuffy the cat. (Who, it must be noted, had the biggest room.)

Today, I could say I write to bask in the glow of reviews (which, frankly, are few and far between, possibly due to my habit of aggressive non-promotion). Yesterday’s new Hyperlink from Hell reviews, my first on Amazon UK, included such head-swellers as:

“The cleverest piece of fiction I’ve ever read.”

(and)

“Somewhere in the multiverse there is a version of me who hasn’t read this book. I feel sorry for her.”

A couple of days ago, if asked why I write, I might have said “Because writing and reading are comforting” and referenced my novel-in-progress, Riding the Bull, the sequel to the above-lauded (and larded) book. In RTB, a character relates this quote, from A. A. Milne’s Piglet, in The House at Pooh Corner:

“Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, while we were underneath it?”

“Supposing it didn’t,” said Pooh after careful thought.

 (See? Comforting!)

Here’s that same character explaining why she became a psychiatrist:

It’s partly thanks to Pooh and Piglet—and lonely, depressed “Eeyore” the donkey—that I became a psychiatrist. I made a list of promises to my mother before she died; the first was to “Take care of Daddy.” The last was, “And if nobody fixes Eeyore, Mommy, I’ll sort him out.”

I was six. I still have that list, and everything’s checked off but Eeyore.

So I write because it’s comforting, and to make things right.

I also write because I’m kinda smart (the Internet says my IQ is 134, so it must be true!), and because I’m kinda dumb (too befuddled to be a waiter, for example; I really admire people who can do that), and because it’s fascinating — to me, at least — to see those two sides of me duke it out on the page. (This is not a pretty spectator sport; it’s hard to see exactly what’s going on — kind of like two bulldogs fighting in a bag.)*

My brain works, when it works, in mysterious ways. I am a curious sort. Just yesterday I was wondering if anyone else’s panties suddenly, irrevocably roll down when they stretch, yawn, or sneeze — and the median age when people give up the valiant fight and start wiping from the front. So I write to explore the gap between the odd way my mind works and the way individual readers’ minds work. I want to know if anyone “gets” me, I guess. (And if they do, I worry about them. I really do.)

But mostly I write for the money. I sold one book this month, so far. In Germany. I made .30 Euro. (Methinks I’ll buy a pony…!)

Or maybe a donkey.

I guess I must write… because it’s fun. Nothing else comes close. (Except, of course, painting pictures on a closet wall.)

*Please do not worry about the bulldogs. They aren’t real.


Peske’s “Little Girl in Red Dress” courtesy Wikimedia Commons.

Other illustrations are Ernest Shepard’s drawings for A. A. Milne’s Winnie the Pooh series.

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Three Steps For Awesome Indie Success

Lindy Moone:

John is the awesome-est!

Originally posted on John L. Monk:

I woke up this morning to polish off the last 500 or so words in this week’s word count (and then some), when I came to a rather profound and marvelous conclusion — the Awesome Indie Project is officially a success. Since the project began, there have been a number of cool developments.

  • I’ve become friends with most of the authors. I send them news/tips, and they send me news/tips. I promote them, and they promote me (though I never ask).  Two of them have become friends with each other. And most of them reblog, retweet, and re-facebook anything I have to say about the other Awesome Indies.
  • Recently, Carol Ervin (the second Awesome Indie added) turned around and cross-promoted the other indies (and me too, though I’m not in the list) in her 3 part blog series: “Indie Authors: Where are they Now?”
  • Every single Awesome Indie has now…

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Strictly Hilarious- interview with Lynda Wilcox

Lindy Moone:

I love Lynda’s cozies! Here’s an interview Susanne did with her–it’s strictly hilarious.

Originally posted on Susanne's Blog:

Strictly Murder Final

As the cover of her books suggest, Lynda Wilcox’s cozy mysteries are, apart from being well written and truly enjoyable, laugh-out-loud hilarious. I’m reading one of them myself at the moment and it’s a real treat.

As I wanted to know more about Lynda and her books, I decided to grill, I mean interview her in order to share this lovely and oh-so-British author with mystery aficionados who might have missed this author’s work (you can thank me when you’ve read her books).

A little bit about Lynda:

Lynda Wilcox’s first piece of published writing was a poem in the school magazine. In her twenties she wrote Pantomime scripts for Amateur Dramatic groups and was a founder member of The Facts of Life, a foursome who wrote and performed comedy sketches for radio. Now she concocts fantasy stories for older children (10-13) and writes funny whodunits for adults.

Lynda…

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“Fool’s Ride” by John L Monk (Creepy creepy glorious!)

Lindy Moone:

Jumped along for the ride! Thanks Carol; now I don’t need to write my own blog post for this little gem…

Originally posted on carolkean:

Joy ride, or freaky, creepy carnival ride: come along.

Daniel Jenkins repeatedly returns to earth in human form to atone for his sins and deliver some good old-fashioned, oh, so gratifying, vigilante justice. Fans of Kick (The Jenkins Cycle Book 1) know Dan committed suicide while in college, bleeding all over the bedding of the girl who’d jilted him. Horrors! What in the world could entice me to spend a whole novel in the point of view of a thoughtless, self-pitying loser like Dan? Does the writer even live who could interest me in this guy’s miserable hereafter? Yes, yes, and yes again.

.Product Details    Fool's Ride (The Jenkins Cycle Book 2)Fool’s Ride (The Jenkins Cycle Book 2)

Alas, poor Dan. He comprehends the magnitude of his stupid act of suicide. His guilt is so stupendous, he somehow finds himself entering the body of a living human man. What happens to the guy’s soul while Dan…

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Traitors Finally Brought to Book

Lindy Moone:

It’s a book! Again! (And I’m so envious. Again.) Why are all my “anTROLLogy” authors publishing more than me? Well done, David. (You creep. ;) )

Originally posted on historywithatwist:

I know this is historywithatwist, but in my own small way I’m making a little history of my own. This is a big day for me. My third Liam Mannion novel, A Time of Traitors, is now live on Amazon. It has taken me almost nine months to write. That’s longer than I spent on either Tan or The Golden Grave, but then I didn’t have as many issues with those books.

At first, I was very clear on what course to take. I had a good, strong opening scene. Shortly after that I wrote another strong scene that was a potential opener. And, eh, then I wrote another one. It was like waiting for a bus to come along only for three to arrive together. I was spoiled for choice.

I scratched my head for a while and then realised that the only way I would…

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