Category Archives: Uncategorized

So Here I Am, a Garden Expert

This won’t end well…

the filthy gardener

My doctor said I had too much stress and needed a hobby.

613445810_2249c2d193_b Me.  I’m on the far right.

“Have you thought about gardening?” he said.  “Gardening takes away stress.  And if you grow and eat vegetables, it’ll help your bowel movements.”

I wasn’t too sure about this bowel movement thing.  I already shit 2 or 3 times a month as it is.  I was worried about what adding bowel movements to that would do to my free time.

And I wasn’t too sure about the hobby thing, either.  I’ve had hobbies before.  They have all gotten me in trouble.  My last hobby was target practice.  It was boring, so I started shooting at tires on moving cars out on the parkway.  You’d be surprised at how much that ups the challenge.

“Give it up,” my attorney told me.  “You can’t afford any more trouble.”

I tend to believe him, even…

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When Pigs Fly…

A few years ago, and just yesterday…

Yesterday would have been my mother’s birthday. I thought and thought about how I wanted to commemorate it, but didn’t quite find the right thing. Then, today, I found this video:

These marvelous pigs, drawn by the amazing Sandra Boynton, look so much like the first thing my mom taught me to draw — little pigs made of circles and triangles, with wry little smiles and snuffly, naughty noses…

I’m glad that she read part of my first novel, that she saw that I was finally on my way to being a published author. That she said, “I’m proud of you.” That I said, “You are the best mom, ever.” And I’m sorry she’s missed the rest of my flight. But Mama’s little piggy took wing and she’s defying the laws of gravity every day.

Wish she could have seen my website. (I did it all myself, Mom.)

Gotta go blow my snuffly nose, now…

If a job’s worth doing…

Good luck to awesome author and journalist David Lawlor in his new life, making our families’ pasts come to, er, life! His is one of the few blogs I still read, and his story in our upcoming “antrollogy” reboot (yes, it really does exist!) is one of my favorites.


Jobs are funny things … you can invest your heart into them, or you can simply take the money and run. I’ve tended towards the former rather than the latter in the course of my journalistic career, but that’s about to change.

After 18 years with my current employer I’m about to head off into the great unknown – and not by choice, but by redundancy. It’s a little scary as prospects go but I’m hearted by the example of others who have made the same leap and found that everything has worked out just fine.

pope-francis-iiYou only have to look to Pope Francis II for an example. Before he donned a collar of his own, he used to grab people by theirs. You see, Il Papa used to be a bouncer in a Buenos Aires nightclub before he answered the call (and I don’t mean the one for last…

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American Demon Hunters: Washington, D.C.

Give it up for John L. Monk! He’s done it again…

John L. Monk

Friends, fans, collection agencies: my novella with J. Thorn came out today — a twisted sort of horror story set in his “American Demon Hunters” universe. If you’ve ever played D&D with an obnoxious player, or gone to Friday Night Magic — smiling and ready for fun — only to get stuck playing a net-decking cheat, you might enjoy this:
American Demon Hunters: Washington D.C.:

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Exorcising The Blurb

I’d buy these, Alianne!

Alianne Donnelly

Read7Call it a synopsis, a back copy, a blurb, or Satan’s revenge upon writers, the 200 or less words that describe a book always have the power to reduce a writer to tears. Over ten book into the game, I can honestly say I still hate blurbage with a passion. Why? Because being forced to distill a story down to one one-thousandth or less is cruel!

Ask me about my book, and you’ll probably get one of two types of responses:

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Interview with Sylva Fae – contributor to charity anthology “You’re Not Alone”

Author Christoph Fischer has been interviewing the authors from the charity anthology I just pre-ordered from Amazon. I can’t reblog them all, but this one… Well, the author and her husband bought a woodland! If you go out in the woods, today…


11705837_967531943267360_280957472_oToday I’m welcoming Sylva Fae whom I’ve met through our work for “You’re Not Alone”, an anthology in aid of MacMillan Cancer Care. This interview is part of a series of blog posts to introduce my colleagues in this endeavour. The anthology is available for pre-order and will be released on July 11. Twenty-seven writers from around the world, including myself have entered an assortment of short stories for your pleasure, show your support by liking the new page on Facebook and expressing an interest in buying the book.

You’ll find the book on your Amazon for per-order via these links:

You’ll find the Facebook page here:

And here is the fund, in loving memory of Pamela Mary Winton

IMG_20141216_220836Tell us a little about yourself as writer and as person.

I am a mum of three small girls and loving it. I love being outdoors in the…

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My spin on the future: Kindle dystopian, 99 cents US & UK–

Get it while it’s a bargain! One of my favorite sci-fi novels of recent years!

A wrong cover and a revamp – case study of rebranding an indie novel

Listen to Roz.

Nail Your Novel

bookshop 12 april 023 smlYou know my bookseller friend Peter Snell, of Barton’s in Leatherhead? (He’s the co-host of our Surrey Hills Radio show So You Want To be A Writer.) Peter is a staunch supporter of indie authors, and he mentioned to me that he’d been talking to an indie writer I know who wanted advice on revamping her novel cover.

Oh you mean Alison Ripley Cubitt, I said. Her science fiction novel?

It’s not science fiction, said Peter. It’s a contemporary eco-thriller.

And therein lay Alison’s biggest problem.

So how did she end up with a cover that sent the wrong message? How was she persuaded to change it – because she’d made that choice for a good reason. And what did she change it to?

I thought this would make a useful case study. Publishers often rebrand covers if they keep a title in print a long time, and…

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Release day: good luck, baby!

Carol’s new book is a real winner. Just out today, and heartily recommended!

Carol Ervin's Author Site

Ridgetop.banner.425x157Because Ridgetop is my fifth book, I’ve a lot less stage fright with this launch. I already know some people will love it and want more and others won’t like it (and may throw rotten tomatoes.) What matters is that I love creating characters and stories, and it turns out that putting my work on stage like this is not a total waste of time. Ridgetop is now available at as ebook ($2.99) and paperback ($14.99).

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Cannes finally outlaws short actors


Flibbertigibbet News

In what is seen as a crackdown on diminutive talent, the 2015 Film Festival has insisted that all women wear heels on the red carpet and that pint-sized men ‘must bring their own pogo stick’. Commentators agree that gone is the Golden Era of Hollywood, when Mickey Rooney could demand to be placed on plinth and his co-stars were forced to saw their own legs off ‘at the knee’.  

So what if you have bunions So what if you have bunions

There is evidence many film scripts have been doctored to accommodate miniature casts; Ewoks were once Wookies, ‘The Hobbit’ originally featured the Jolly Green Giant and ‘Little Women’ was about an all-female basketball team. Responding to public pressure, Cannes has attempted to remove undersized actors with oversized egos; focusing on underrated but vertically-blessed performers such as David Prowse, King Kong and ‘that woman who holds the torch for Columbia Pictures’.

Cannes insisted that it was…

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