Tag Archives: charity anthology

Bells on Troll Fingers, Bells on Troll Toes!

for-whom-the-bell-trolls-facebook-cover-12-16It’s Alive! The 2nd edition of our charity antrollogy for grown-ups, For Whom the Bell Trolls, is now available at Amazon! With two new stories and an afterword by Aristotle, no less! Here’s a little something…

…about the Antrollogy

Submitted for your perusal: a smorgasbord of trolls. Literal trolls, literary trolls. Trolls in space, trolls in cyberspace. Trolls that are naughty, trolls that are nice. Troll detectives, trolls that have lice. That’s just the way it is, with trolls.

…about The Authors

Some of the authors are well-known. Some are just not well, not well at all. Some are hiding under their beds, or possibly bridges. Some should be. That’s just the way it is, with authors.

Our international authors have something in common: they have contributed their work for free, in hopes that readers will make donations to charities they support — charities listed in their bios, after their stories.

All but two of these stories were written for this antrollogy. All but one are making their debut. We hope you’ll enjoy the stories and follow their authors’ links to your doom. (Just testing whether you read this far. You did.)

… about The Editors

John L. Monk and I met online, and were immediately smitten… with each other’s books. So much so, in fact, that the moderator told us to get a room.

Instead, I got the idea for a charity antrollogy — after being “trolled” on a spoof news website. I penned the title story and invited a select group of authors to write their own, starting with John. Some were members of critiquecircle.com, my favorite online critique group; others were published authors John and I had met through reviewing books or stories, or through KBoards, the website devoted to all things Kindle. Some were spotted at The Writer’s Pub, an online authors’ hangout. A few we met along the way… and two were brave souls who had stuck up for me on that naughty news site. Much to my surprise, almost everyone said yes!

For more about us and all the authors, please read the bios after our stories. As for those books that got us into this troll story business…

His: Kick

Hers: Hyperlink from Hell: a Couch Potato’s Guide to the Afterlife

I would like to thank The Academy

Once upon a time, For Whom the Bell Trolls was mine, all mine. That is to say, the concept was mine: invite indie authors to build a book about trolls — a book that could showcase our talents and make cold, hard e-cash for worthy causes.

I’d love to take the credit for everything; I will take the credit (and the blame) for the puns and pictures, for the silly Easter Egg Hunt, and for each and every typo in this unique book. But For Whom the Bell Trolls is unique because of all the talented and generous people who came together to make it so. The authors have donated their stories for free, but they’ve also been troopers throughout the editing process, crying “Uncle” (more often “Auntie”) for the greater good — sometimes gladly, sometimes stoically. (Sometimes, I suspect, huddled in their closets, their anguished cries muffled by flimsy lingerie clutched to their quivering lips and heaving bosoms — and that’s just the men.) Some of the authors also helped with proofreading, and the charming and hilarious John L. Monk, “Droll Troll” and co-editor, really had my back.

Thanks always to my much better half, Boo, for putting up with all my crazy, all these years, and for all the awesome tech support.

This book is dedicated to Gretchen Sackett, my kick-ass sister, who made the publication of the first edition possible. Gretchen died suddenly only three months after the release of its first edition , and hearts were broken from sea to shining sea. If you’d like to know more about this amazing woman, please read my blog post about her:

Alive: A Letter to Neil Gaiman.

Now that the second edition is out, I’d love to thank by name everyone who reviews it, who tweets and shares and blogs about it, but of course that is impossible. And for those who donate to the charities: Thank you. You’re good eggs. For Whom the Bell Trolls… trolls for thee. Stop by our facebook page anytime, to chat. But first…

… about our Book Launch

Please  join me and as many of the authors as we can lasso on Saturday, December 17th at noon, US Central Time Zone, for our Book Launch Event, hosted by Scott Burtness, author of the Monsters In The Midwest series! northwoods-wolfman-cover Feel free to ask us impertinent questions, learn Too Much Information about our sordid lives and books, and otherwise spend up to two hours of your precious Holiday Shopping Time with us, huddled with the device of your choice wherever you generally huddle when doing embarrassing things on the Internet.

I expect there will be a giveaway or two, too! Hope to see you there.

An April Fool… in Love?

Troll e book launch today — only at Amazon! Here’s a sneak peek at just one of my many illustrations for For Whom the Bell Trolls, the world’s first and only charity anTROLLogy for grown-ups, edited by John L. Monk and me: A Fool for Love. For me, this book has been a year-and-a-half long labor of love, after all. Of course, when you are a troll in love, “clubbing” takes on a whole new meaning…

Romance riotI hope you will buy the book today, if you can; since all profits will be donated by the publisher to Equality Now, the higher we can get the book in the Amazon rankings the more visibility — and therefore the greater income for the charity! Here’s my pitch for this unique book of funny, thrilling, mysterious, moving and sometimes naughty stories. (We mean it; this book is for adults who never quite grew up, not for kids who hope to do so!) In addition to stories donated by 22 authors from all over the world, you will find my first published illustrations… and even feisty troll haiku and an Easter egg hunt! So please share. And have a wonderful April Fool’s Day.

troll ad for back of books larger text See it on Amazon.com or Amazon UK !

Get Your Cliches from Hell Here!

Yesterday, I read this:

The Top Ten Storytelling Cliches that Need to Disappear Forever

Did you read it? Or did you skip to here? If you skipped, that’s okay. Who’s gonna know? But the rest of this post will make more sense if you click on the link and at least skim the list of cliches, m’kay?

Now: Here’s what I think about that post:

“I agree! And I’m dancing with glee!”

“Huh?” you say. “How can you agree that a writer shouldn’t use this list of cliches? For fuck’s sake, Hyperlink from Hell is loaded with them!”

To which I say: “You bet it is! It’s front-end loaded! It’s satire, remember? I can’t begin to say how thrilled I am to have hit the bullseye on 7 out of 10 of these!”

But listen: Hyperlink isn’t JUST satire. It isn’t just Pinocchio, poking his little (and sometimes not-so-little) nose into society’s blowhole to see where the bloated whale of our culture springs a leak. I took great pains to make sure he’s also a real boy — a real story about real(ish), crazy people. And I know some of you readers REALLY get that. And I love you for it.

But I’ve also realized that for other readers to get that, they need the other two books in the series, like, NOW. And they aren’t finished. So maybe I should have waited ’til they were done before publishing the first book, but live and learn — and I’ve learned so much from this last year and met so many wonderful readers and other writers, that I wouldn’t go back and change a thing…

Except one. I will soon be uploading a new version of the ebook, with a preview of the second book plopped on the end. Yes, you will soon learn if there’s a body in the tunnel! You won’t have to wait. And after I make those changes, I will make the book free for a while.

Then, after the troll anthology is out, I will write my fingers off to get those other two books out as soon as I can.

Now, about those cliches… Let’s have some fun with them!

1. Characters describing themselves in mirrors: Yes, Jimmie does, just once, stare at his face in the mirror and describe what he sees. But since his appearance keeps changing at Al’s Almighty whim, how else would he know what he looks like at any given time? It’s a win-win!

3. Blaming bad behavior on bad parenting: The whole book is a satirical look at this one. ‘Nuff said.

4. Too many inside jokes/references: All part of the satirical experience, at no extra charge.

5. The chosen one: Bullseye!

6. Countdown clocks: I am practically orgasmic that they included this one on the list!

7. Veiling your message in a dream: Or three! Weeeeeeee!!!

10. Knocking characters unconscious for plot convenience: Poor Jimmie! I did this countless times to him! And all on purpose! (I am a fucking genius!)

Now, I know what you’re thinking:

“What about numbers 2 (Broadcasting an upcoming plot twist), 8 (Using sex as wish fulfillment) and 9 (Magical Negroes and Noble Savages)?”

Well, I’ll do my best to squeeze 2 and 8 into books 2 and 3, but as for 9? No fucking way. I will simply have to admit defeat on that one — wouldn’t touch it with a 10-foot Polish person — but you know, my own list of Cliches from Hell…

Is just getting started!

Grant E. Hamilton’s 1885 political cartoon for the “The Judge” magazine.

(Wikimedia Commons)

 

Something is Now Available!

(Click the cover to go to Amazon.)

It’s a boy! And a girl! On a trip! Reading!

Now, I know what you’re thinking: This thing must be Photoshopped. Those two are waaaaaay too skinny, and the girl only has one arm! In fact, there’s no way they could even stand up without snapping like twigs. But that’s why they are sitting, people, and why it’s a good thing they have Something to Take on the Trip. (Including my story, Vietnam With a Side of Asparagus — a peculiar slice of my childhood life.)

Thanks to author/editor Stella Wilkinson for putting this anthology together, to Frank Zubek, for cracking the whip, to all the other authors who donated stories (including some famous ones!), and to Gayle Ramage, who donated the cover, which not only is beautiful and NOT Photoshopped, it is color coordinated with my trilogy covers.  How did she know? Cover coordination! (I may have to lie down. Also, I may have to get her to do my other covers. I take waaaaaay too long!)

Now, back to what’s important: All proceeds go to The Grand Appeal, a Children’s Hospital charity. It’s $3.99 well spent! For more information, please go to the website.

Get yours today.

No, really. GET YOURS TODAY.

 

Trolls for Equality Now!

Greetings, troll watchers!

trollfrontcoverwithspine

I have news! Not only do we have a publisher for the charity anthology, we also have picked the charity: Equality Now. 

Please scroll down to watch Joss Whedon’s speech about why he supports this worthy cause — and if you watch from the beginning, you’ll get to see Meryl Streep introduce him! (It’s worth it.)

Thank you in advance to all the wonderful writers who are contributing troll stories for the anthology. And troll poems. And — who knew? — even troll haiku!

Our publisher, The Etling Press, is the brand new publishing division of the award-winning San Francisco design firm, Reflectur. They will handle all the nitpicky financial details, and at materials cost! The Etling Press is so new that they don’t even have a separate website or a logo yet. But Reflectur has many, many years of experience with pro-bono work for charity — and they have their own on-site events venue, The Box SF, in downtown San Francisco.

%d bloggers like this: